With my new drivers license in hand, I did what any normal, red-blooded 16-year- old would do: something really stupid. I hopped in the family car, picked up my friend, Calvin, then proceeded to throw water balloons out the window at trees. The game wasn’t as worthless as it seems — you got a point for each tree you hit.
My winning streak was rudely interrupted by the long arm of the law. Luckily, I only received a warning. Emboldened by my immunity to the rules of the road, the next week I sailed through main street at Mach II, windows open and radio blaring. My girlfriend was impressed; the cop who issued me a speeding ticket wasn’t.
I was outraged. Didn’t the police have more important things to do, like foiling bank heists? Apparently not, because the next morning the chief called my home (they do that in small towns of 6,700) and my mother dragged me down to the station for a good talking to.
I expected the usual “blah blah safety blah blah rules blah blah responsibility” lecture. So I was flabbergasted when the chief looked me in the eye and said “Son, how’d you like a foolproof way of taking advantage of the law?”
I was too dumbstruck to answer immediately, so the chief kept on talking. “Here’s what you do. Stick your tongue out at my men as you drive by them, and there’s not a damn thing they can do about it – I guarantee you.”
Now I was all ears! “You’re going to give me an inside tip on how to put the screws to the screws?” I asked belligerently. “What do I have to do?”
“Simple. If the speed limit is 25 miles per hour, go 25 miles per hour or less. If you come to a red light, stop. Don’t throw anything out the window, especially water balloons. If you follow the rules of the road, you can stick your tongue out at my officers and I guarantee they won’t stop you. Try it. Your mother is witness to my promise.”
Well, this struck a chord with my righteous teenage indignation. Who wouldn’t want to stick his tongue out at the cops? And who would have dared? Now I had an invitation!
The next day I picked up Calvin and told him what we were going to do. I dutifully followed the rules of the road, and whenever I passed a cop we both stuck our tongues out at him. Lo and behold, he waved me on.
Years later, the significance of the lesson from the chief finally sunk in: when I follow the rules of life, I can stick my tongue out at failure, and failure will nod and wave me on without stopping me.
- When I follow the simple rule for making friends – be nice – I make lots of friends.
- When I follow the simple rule for being interesting – be interested – people tell me I am very interesting.
- When I follow the rule for making money – learn to love money for the wonderful and helpful things I can do with it – money flocks to me. Put another way, when you follow the rules of living prosperously you can stick your tongue out at scarcity, and scarcity can’t do a damn thing about it.
Every time you try to conquer life by breaking its rules (drinking too much, lying, stealing, cheating), life conquers you. Life-victory is the result of following the rules.
Will you help me out by offering an example of how you followed the rules and won a sweet victory?
Thank you, and blessings
P.S. It wasn’t until several months after the chief called me in that I learned his little game. All of the officers on his force were told that if a teenager drove by and stuck his tongue out at them, they could rest assured that the kid was strictly observing the law. Pretty shrewd cop, eh?
Here is a $67,000 tip that is at YOUR fingertips. Listen to this weeks WROAR Blog Talk Radio show: “Working Out with Arnold Schwarzenegger.” Learn how to move mountains (and decimal points in your bank account).
Look inside! Download a free chapter of A Second Chance at Success here.
“Best Comment of the Week.” This weeks best comments come from Julie from A Clear Sign and Debbie from Happy Maker Now. Thank you for your heartfelt sharing. See their comments here. Illustrations by nick
Hi Rob! Great show. I had to hop on and tell you that I enjoyed the life lesson you brought to the radio show. You are like an onion! Many many layers, keep peeling! I like it a lot. I never would have guessed Arnold had something to teach ME. I always thought he was kind of a joke. But he has a powerful mind that that goes with that muscle bound body. (I hear he is kind of a short guy… is that true?). For certain I respect all the boundaries he has overcome. Sometimes I feel like I use 5% of my brain just to get through the day. Then I use 99% of my brain to deal with the details. I would like to start incorporating some of the visualiztion techiniques you talk about. I start the day off with the good intentions to be awake and mindful. But inevitably I get bogged down by detail, detail, detail and forget about the big picture. It is a battle between the short terms demands of life, and the long term goal of feeling foot loose and fancy free. If I were to “lick my fingertip” and visualize an ideal outcome I would be equally at ease at home and abroad. There would be no boundaries… I would become “monarch of all I survey” (as a wizened old man once said.)
I have a powerful tip for you Carol Anne. Are you ready? You do not need to feel self-worth to succeed. You need to drop the illusion that you need a feeling of self-worth in order to succeed. This is at the bottom of what you are looking for. Life will unfold so much easier for you when you a absorb this tip. Blessings
Ha. I can just picture Arnold clear as a bell in your story. I never really considered all the achievements he has under his belt. I think that with celebrity super stars like that normal people take on an us vs. them mentality. Like they are just born lucky and exist outside the normal rules of life. But the lesson I get is that only thing that sets them apart is that they have an incredible focus. When Arnold was building his biceps he didnt just go through the motions, he trained his mind just as hard. He must have taken the same approach to becoming governor. I can’t quite relate to focusing on any one thing so intently. I’m a bit more scattered. I’m learning to make being a solid, honest guy my million-dollor bicep. If I can do well by my family then I think being a superstar in that circle is a successful life.
hi Roger. Here is a big one for you to ponder. Are you ready? The more you let right things happen inwardly, the easier it gets to let good things happen outwardly. Arnold mastered this. You’re beginning to get it. Thank you
Hi Rob, Just wanted to check in and say how much I like these life-experirnce-vignettes. Keep it coming. I know you are not into the Tim Ferris philosophy of life, but, personally I can relate to the simple, true and sincere life experience of doing your life “homework”… It’s like I just have to experience life and be vulnerable… ?? No? Anywho, The lesson I will learn is something I can’t begin to anticipate until I figure out the rules of life… very cool concept. Maybe like the 4-hour body… you could do the 1 Minute shut the fuk up and listen ti some REal EXPERIENCE??! Ha! Just an idea Thanks again. Looking forward to your next duck tale. woo woo
Hi Pat. And now a great idea for you to think about. One way to explain human carelessness is to say that a man lets someone else represent him. Too many folks look for others to represent them (to tell them how to think, what to believe, what to value, what to say, and what to do). Not you, right Pat?
When it comes to your life, no one (not me, Not Ferris, not Napoleon Hill, not Tony Robbins) should represent you. I like your authentic style, I really do. Blessings
Hi Rob. What a week for me. So many changes are happening. Not the big breakthroughs I was expecting a year ago, but I have to just believe that I am laying some ground work for the future. Moving some of my stuff back home has been equal parts depressing and super motivating. If anything I more motivated than ever to get my career off the ground just so I can the heck out of here!
I think I am following the rules of life this time. Instead of deludinng myself into thinking a $100K job is waiting to fall in my lap, I’m getting back to reality and doing the work that will help me in the long run. As long as keep my eyes on the prize and see my move home as a stepping stone rather than a stumbling block (as you so awesomley taught me) I will follow the rules of life all the way to Manhattan. 
Hi Kara. Student: Why does life give me one hard knock after another? Teacher: Because you live in the land of hard knocks. What does that have to do with you, Kara? When you move out of the psychological land of hard knocks,you will move to Manhattan easily. Blessings
Hey brother man. I dig what your saying here. It’s kind of pardoxical for people like me. I spend all my time trying to NOT follow rules and make up own mind. But, what your saying is that we have to live in peace and harmony with the world. There truths that apply to everyone. People get in trouble when they become self-centered and think the world revolves around them. That is the ultimate rule people break all the time. That’s why so many people walk around agitated and angry — the straight up think about themselves too damn much! Everyday of my life is a sweet victory when I wake up see that there are a brand new 24 hours ahead of me and I vow to live fully in each moment. When I can go through my day like that I just spread the love to other people in anyway I can. Thats the rule of being a happy human being: Forget about yourself and just do anything you can for others!
Hi Rus. Rule # 1 for helping others is to help yourself first. Only when you feel good about yourself and the your world, can you truly help others feel good about themselves and their world. Blessings
Hi Robert. I used to have a paper route and got quite adept at throwing newspapers out the window. That job was a good lesson in responsibility but I never learned how to make a million dollars from what I learned. One rule that stuck with me from those years was the old “haste makes waste” adage. When I would try to “break the rules” by rushing to get through the morning route I would inevitably have a few errant throws that landed in the bushes. And if I didnt get out of the car and put the paper on the door step you can be sure I would receive a call from an angry customer. I tried many tricks to cut down on time so I could sleep in a little later. I finally realized that the best most effective and surprisingly fastest way to get it all done was “slowly and deliberately”… Later on I saved enough pennies to get my first convertible which made throwing the paper a hell of lot easier.
Hi Salty. Your aim is to allow mind and emotion to flow as one, just as two streams come together to become a flowing river. You have mastered this. Teach others. Thank you
Hi Rob. I always have a hard time taking Arnold seriously. All I see are his dumb movies and his marital trangressions. He may have a strong mind but he’s must have a few screws loose with an ego that big. I beg to differ on your assessment of Arnold. I think he is totally driven by Ego and if someone is working that hard to inflate their sense of self worth that just aint happy. I mean really… whats up with a hyper focus on building muscles? So you can look good! And when that wasnt enough he became hell bent on getting his ugly mug up on Movie screens. And then did he really marry for love or for his own vanity and ambitions? I don’t see how you could be in a happy marriage if your pulling those whacky stunts. I guess it all rubs me the wrong way because people can train and focus their minds to all kinds of destructive things. The problem isn’t that people need to learn how to focus their minds, its that more people have to learn to focus on doing things that contribute positive vibrations to the world.
Hi John. I appreciate your opinion. To succeed in your aim, you must not be in conflict with yourself. Armold is not in conflict when it comes to building a great body, being a movie star and winning at the game of polictics. YES, he is in conflict when it comes to family. We all have more learning to do, don’t we. Thank you
Hi Rob,
I couldn’t agree more my friend. When we follow the rules of life, we tend to win. I have experienced this many times like when I attracted a harmonious relationship, increased the money that flows to me, stopped to take things too personal among other things. For me, all of these things are based in the spiritual domain. If I’m in harmony with God, things tend to flow to me easily. As you beautifully always put it, “if it aint practical, it aint spiritual.” The more we deal with life issues spiritually, the more we win at life. To get to this level, this requires us to understand ourselves fully, observe and adjust our inner self talk to help us realize our goals among other things. Thank you for sharing my friend.
Hi Dia. A man does not have a dozen problems; he has but one problem; he’s not understanding that he is a spiritual being have dozens of human experiences. Once he gets this, life gets a lot easier. You got it! Blessings
Great post Rob. One of the most helpful rules in my life is a rule, or principle, my wife JoAnn has been reminding me of ever since we began dating.
“One step at a time.”
Many times I’ve felt my tempo getting a bit out of hand and I say to myself, One step at a time, and sanity, power and effectiveness returns.
Thanks for your steadfast gift Rob.
Hi Christopher. YES, one step at a time is a fabulous rule for winning. When we feel completely powerless, we still have enough strength to take one more babystep … and right there we find the power we need to take the next one and the next one, don’t we. Thank you
A great reminder of how sometimes we put obstacles up in front of us without realising it. All paths have been trodden before us, and the pathways are free and clear. If the rules are followed then we will reach our destination eventually.
Hi Jamie. Just as wings of an eagle have no meaning to a field mouse, rules of success have no meaning to a fool. You are no fool; you know the importance to winning rules. Thank you
> you can stick your tongue out at scarcity, and scarcity can’t do a damn thing about it.
That is classic!
I’ve always been a fan of the abundance mindset. I’m also a fan that if there is not a bigger opportunity available, then make one.
I’m a fan of the feelings, thoughts, and actions that flow from abundance, and I am not a fan of the spiral down that scarcity creates.
Hi J.D. This is a great comment. It tells a lot about what you value (what you are a fan of and what you are not a fan of). It seems that you are a fan of winning at the game of life … that’s what I get from your comment. Fabulous! Blessings
Hi Rob — this post was definitely thought-provoking for me — my first reaction when you said you were able to stick your tongue out at the cops as long as you obeyed the speed limit was that this approach would probably get me arrested where I live, because the police would find some excuse for stopping and harassing me if I did that. It does seem that I have a belief that “authority figures will apply rules arbitrarily and based on their egos.” Maybe that view is not serving me.
Hi Chris. The only thing on earth that really persecutes a man is his own unconscious wrongness. Can you see how this has worked for you (or against you)? Thanks for your honesty.
Hi Rob. This kind of interesting. I’m a real rule follower. Must have been my strict upbringing. It’s kind of stifling at times but I have to admit, because I’ve followed the rules I’ve come out ahead of the pack on many things. When I was in college I didn’t drink or party but just focused on my studies. I didn’t have much fun, but it was overall a very fulfilling time in my life. Because I was so rigorous in my schoolwork, I had no trouble landing a good job right out of college. My career has followed a similar path of rule following and climbing up the ladder. I love my work and feel good about what I do, so I feel content about living my life by those rules. But you know what I missed out on is having fun! That’s a rule I’m trying to learn – make more friends, have more fun and find a super-hot girlfriend. My challenge is to ease up on the rigorous side of career and make some rules to have more fun.
Hi Alan. Nice distinction. There are rules for success, and there are rules for simply laying back and enjoying life, aren’t there, Alan. Some folks have too many rules for work. Some have too many for leisure. It all shows up in one’s life. Thank you.