September 16th, 2010 by rob white
The first person that I must be loyal to (if I intend to enjoy life’s many riches and share them with others), IS MYSELF.
‘To thine own self be loyal and true’… and then you will find the enthusiasm that you need to help yourself (and in turn – help others). The lack of loyalty to your own success and happiness is the most frequent reason for a failed life. It is also the most frequent reason for not being able to make the contribution that you would like to make to your community.
I remember believing that if I was loyal to the demands of my boss or my girlfriend or my father (all years ago), then life’s myriad riches would pour down upon me. Hmmm.
So long as you maintain a spirit of loyalty to yourself (which is to commit to your personal growth and development), you naturally exercise your inherent right to live a prosperous life. (Remember- prosperity is always more than financial success) With the quality of self-loyalty under your psychic belt – you find answers to overcome any challenges that say ‘NO’ to you.
When you are loyal to yourself, you gain a much deeper understanding of what it means to have infinite potential. You not only build a tendency toward enthusiasm, but you also find it easy to control your attention and support it with laser-like thinking.
Without the quality of self-loyalty, I cannot build a sturdy foundation upon which to launch a thousand versions of my unlimited potential. 
The tendency of enthusiasm, backed with controlled attention and laser-like thinking, gives you the confidence you need to create your life anew so that you may experience your future as you want it to be. Your potential is powerful stuff!
I have learned over time that I must take every step possible to create a harmonious relationship with all the parts of me. All of the parts of me align with my aspirations and aims when I take the time to create the spirit of inner teamwork:
* Stop all inner battles
* No more opposing opinions dominating my inward self-talk
* Aligning my thoughts and actions to support my aspirations and aims
Keep your plans of self-loyalty to yourself. It is not anyone’s business to know your deep personal business. No person becomes a master of life without first becoming a master of self-loyalty.
This one pronouncement, when taken seriously, can become the source of a thousand victories out there in the world: to thine own self be loyal and true! I have now revealed to you a powerful working principle that has enabled me to live victoriously for the past decade.
(1.) What will you contribute as a comment?
(2.) Where, in your life, has self-loyalty proven to be the key to outer victory?
Every mind needs friendly contact with inward self-talk that supports an enthusiastic point of view. Be loyal to this cause and you are loyal to YOU.
blessings, and thank you……… rob
PLEASE NOTE: One winner of the “Best Comment of the Week” will receive an absolutely free copy of 180. This weeks grand prize winner is Joy from Unfolding Your Path to Joy Blog. The runner up is Nadia from Happy Lotus Lifestyles. Thank you all for your great contributions. See their comments here here.
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Hi Rob,
Very nice article. I agree with you if we are not loyal to our growth, then we won’t enjoy life’s riches. You mentioned a powerful line that we have to align our thoughts and actions to our aims and aspirations. This is so true, if everyone could do that, life would be so much different and everyone would have what he/she wants. Thanks for sharing Rob
YES, Dia, aligning one’s thoughts with one’s aspirations guarantees success. Anything less is an act of doubt, of which we can all do without. Self-loyalty is self-alignment= thoughts, visions, feelings and aspirations all lined up. Thank you
Mr White: I relate heavily with this article. I’m a huge advocate of self-loyalty. I profess the importance of being “your own business”, even if your an employee.
For me, when I went back to corporate America after spending a few successful years running my own business – I realized what made me successful in my own venture could make me just as successful in any arena…this was operating as a business (being self-loyal).
Being self-loyal, to me, doesn’t mean being selfish. I describe it as doing things inline with my life priorities and not putting someone else’s agenda before my own.
Great article…I love the art as well!
Peace
Thanks, Jk. INDEED, self loyalty does not mean being selfish, greedy or egocentric. Nice touch. Hearing about self-loyalty and practicing self-loyalty are two very different things. You have practiced it – you know that. blessings!
I like your style, Mr. Hustle. If there is one thing I’m good at it is being true to myself. I love your concept of self-loyalty. I think people have labeled me a screw up in the past when in fact I was just sticking with my gut. I don’t listen to naysayers but keep marching forward to the beat of a different drummer.
Rob,
This makes me consider how important personal balance becomes in everything we do. We can’t be too passive or too aggressive. No matter what emotional state we experience, we must have a way to maintain a baseline that provides personal health and relational health. We must be loyal to others through a source of integrity, where we have trust and honesty in our relationships. Though, we can’t exclude ourselves from long-term growth in the process. A tricky balance at times. Thanks for the post!
YES, Joe, if the ego gets involved in self-loyalty, you can bet on it that it becomes self-centeredness (selfishness), and that’s certainly not it! By allowing the ego to tell us how to live, we allow its confusion to punish us. blessings
@ Rus: thanks for the props. Sounds like you’re one who believes in themselves enough to be loyal to your own gut. I think it takes a certain level of confidence to trust your own gut, to avoid the the naysayers and to be loyal to your own rhythm.
Being self-loyal presents you with a unique set of keys…like a thousand of them. The keys can be used for a number of things, including obtaining victories.
Peace.
YES, Jk … we cannot be content unless we are loyal to our principles and values. Self-loyalty assures that we do not run amuck. blessings.
Sadly Rob self-loyalty for me got lost for many years under the pressure and influence of society, parents and family expectation and authority figures. The good news is I’ve go my personal mojo mission back and am proudly hoisting my own flag again. The great thing about self-loyalty is that you can get it back at any age (I’m over 40) and any time. As the only person we spend our whole life with is ourself it’s the one person to stay loyal too always!
NICE … well spoken, John. You speak from experience, which always offers wisdom. To discover our true selves we must be self-loyal. Thank you.
Rob,
When we know who we are and follow our own values and need before taking care of others helps. Occasionally we may put other’s need before us, such as ailing parents, or small kids but if we were to do it for long term, we can get burn our and resent situation.
I as a mother of 2 little ones, sometime put myself last and I know those time I am worn out.
I can relate to what Preeti said. I can’t be reminded enough that we need to put self-loyalty first. It is so easy to get pushed and pulled in all directions by everyone else. I’ve come across people who want to force me into ONLY playing the role of mother. I love this role but I refuse to believe that is all there is to me. I also want to be loyal to that voice of creativity that I hear.
Carol Ann,
I am glad I am not the only mother who feels that way! Being mom is rewarding and hard work both!
Rob,
You are so kind, I try to be pragmatic but I know I have lot to learn and I love learning from you always here.
Thank you Preeti, I always love your pragmatic contributions to the blog. You are a wonderful breath of logical fresh air. Whatever ails us, we can always awaken from it with practical thinking. PRACTICAL THINKING IS SPIRITUAL COMMON SENSE .. THEY ARE INSEPARABLE. blessings.
Staying true to who you are or who you want to become until those characteristic arrive, creates self loyalty. The problem is, most people are the opinions of others everyday of the week. Now if thats the case, how are you suppose to be find yourself, if Everyday, your believing the ideologies of those who just want to criticize who you are.
It just makes sense to be you. Let all other aspects fall under.
YES, jonathan, people create themselves to be ‘the opinions of others’ in hopes of being accepted. Indeed, there is no self-loyalty in that act. Imagine being a beautiful grand piano and allowing others to plink your keys (even though you have the capacity to play a beautiful symphony). Hmmm. Nice comment. thank you
About a year and a half ago my world started spinning in directions I couldn’t fathom. I stood toe –to-toe with denial (not mine) and found myself wanting to believe and wanting to fall into the space as it seemed so nice and rosy and warm and fuzzy.
Yet my inner voice kept saying “No.” The reality wasn’t what I was seeing – reality and truth lived within me. I soon came to hear that voice and to respond with integrity. Despite accusations, blame, and suggestions that my love no longer existed in the situation, I stayed true to that voice – I stayed true to myself.
It has been quite a journey and one that continues to date; however, because I heard the voice and aligned my words and actions with that voice and its truth… my daughter and I are in a good place now surrounded by family and friends and able to give our love to those who touch our lives. I couldn’t give of myself when I was wanting to buy into the fantasy – I felt torn in pieces.
There are times when I wonder how it is that people choose to live without personal integrity. How is it easier to live to the expectations of others or deny the inner voice? I am not only teaching my daughter to live with integrity but I am teaching her to listen to her heart and do what she feels is best regardless of what others do or say. She needs to know how it feels to be true to herself and live in thaw alignment.
It all starts with being true to one’s self.
WOWEE, now that is a great personal example of what we are talking about; thank you thank you. Romances get rough when two insecure individuals make demands on one another. Security is found in reality – you have proven that to yourself. Wonderful response. blessings
Wow… what a moving story Exception. Your daughter is lucky to be instilled with these principles. It’s the most important thing you could ever teach her.
There’s so much wisdom in what you say here, Rob. A lot of inner turmoil is caused by not listening to that inner voice from within. It seems preposterous to say that all the answers we need we can find within ourselves. But everytime I veer off course, I always come back to finding the answer within me. Loyalty to oneself is really the only way to be authentic and to flourish. If we strenghten ourselves, if we don’t betray ourselves, any knocks and blows from outside forces will only be temporary.
YES, Belinda,, self-betrayal is the worst kind of betrayal. A woman walked through the park and got mugged. She continued to walk the same path through the same park and continued to get mugged. Who was betraying her – others or herself? Nice comment. Thank you
Hi Rob!
I think sometimes we underestimate self-loyalty. Life can pull us in so many directions that it can be easy to forget about our commitment to personal growth.
I try to be loyal to myself by staying true to my passions. Whenever a new project comes up, I check whether it’s in alignment with my purpose. If it is, I’ll take it on. If it’s not, I’ll pass. This procedure also helps de-clutter my life.
Loving blessings!
Nice distinctions, Andrea … self-loyalty is about commitment to personal growth and staying true to your passions. Thank you. A willingness to be self-loyal hones our ears for inspirational guidance. blessings.
Rob,
You have such a great way of getting your message across – and I love that!
I have recently been focusing more on this – and because of this focus toward more self loyalty – it’s become much easier for me to say “no” to those things which don’t ring true for me. And in that…leaving the space to say “yes” to what really matters…
INDEED, Lance, self-loyalty is tha ability to say ‘NO’ to things that doanot ringatrue for us. NICE! To know that we must start being self-loyal is an excellent start! blessings.
Hi Rob,
What a wonderful topic – self loyalty. I’ve never even thought about it before. I do think we need to have self-loyalty before we can be truly loyal to others. We can’t give to anyone unless we feel fulfilled which I think includes having self-loyalty.
Self-fulfillment and self-loyalty indeed … do align, Angela. Nice touch! Increase your inner wealth by increasing your loyalty to self. Blessings.
This is something I knew once, then forgot for a time, and now am remembering again. When I was in college I was able to shrug off all the people who said I was wasting my time, that I’d end up spending my life asking “Do you want fries with that?”, because I had a plan – I was going to be a historian, full stop, nothing going to stand in my way. Then I got married, had a couple of kids with serious medical problems, and found myself stuck in a 9-to-5 I hated with no visible way out, because I lost faith in myself. Recently I’ve remembered what I’m capable of when I don’t stop myself, and even though I’m still in a job that I hate, now I see a way out and I’m taking steps in that direction.
Wonderful spirit, Jason. I appreciate your honesty. Keep the inner task clear, by remembering to be loyal to ‘self’ … and outer tasks will resolve themselves. Really!! Blessings.
You better believe I am a self-loyalist… (hmm maybe that should be a new political party.) I’ve learned not to be derailed by what others think is best for me. For many years I gave up on my own ambitions of writing. That is my biggest regret. But better late than never, now I am unperturbed by all the rejections. I’m persistent SOB… now Im putting my stubborness to good use.
Cool story, Jason… That’s pretty intense. Self=loyalty seems to be a big one with the great artists and musicians too. It’s a quality we all need to pay attention to.
Rob: I love this advice. Being loyal to your self makes so much sense and I appreciate how you clearly explained what it means to really be loyal to yourself. I particularly thought what you said about aligning your life and making certain you aren’t allowing limiting beliefs to work against you. Thanks for the great insights and wisdom. Great post.
Thank you, Sibyl. One way to demonstrate self-loyalty is to deliberately interrupt your usual thoughts during the day to ponder something of special interest to your growth and development. Doing things like this make a big difference. blessings.
Hi Rob.
If I have self-loyalty, then all is in my control. I used to question this concept, but all my errors are based on my own errors, and not on some issues caused by others.
When we win with ourselves, we win with everyone else. I have seen this to be the case time and time again.
We must focus on “me”, and then we can do great for others as a by-product.
Yes, Armen, when we sincerely do what is best for ourselves, we can be of benefit to others. It is a harmful error to assume that if we do as others command that it will be of benefit to ourselves and the world at large. Real intelligent action comes from self-command. blessings
Hi Rob,
Apologies for the delay in getting to this post. I am honored that I was a runner-up! Thank you for that piece of news.
What you wrote about self-loyalty was perfect. I have always been the kind of person who just innately did things differently. People would go left and I would naturally go right. It was tough when I was a kid and there was a point in my journey where I tried to conform. I hated every single second of it because it felt so fake.
So I made the tough decision and decided to embrace my uniqueness. It was hard at first but over time, it became easier because I just felt more free. Some people didn’t like it but that was fine…it just showed me that they weren’t real friends anyway.
Feeling fake is bad for us, Nadia. It’s a signal that we are not being loyal to self. Nice distinction. Discouragement arises from psychic hypnosis – which is when we pretend to be someone we are not. blessings.
That sounds like me, Nadia. Always going left when someone says right. I still can’t figure out if it is a blessing or a curse for me. I already know what my wife would say. ha ha.
I’ve always had that trait of self-loyalty. That is something do right. Whenever I betray that part of me I feel sick. Like when I was in school and took part in bullying a kid. I still regret that. Funny what sticks with yo
This is indeed soul-provoking articles. Being loyal to our inward life means being deeply routed in our core values. One we start staying loyal to our inward life our mindset changes naturally, because we stop controlling, or competeting and start contributing. We shift ourselves from ego-driven life to soul-driven life. When the life is soul-driven peace prevails on its own without any extra effort. Very good article, many thanks – Vinay
Thanks for visiting and for this wonderful addition, Vinay. Indeed self-loyalty is a core value that exists naturally within. We need not add anything but rather it is a stripping away.
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